I desire to be a good friend. When I die, that’s what I would love to be remembered by. Not money, achievements… but “he was a true friend”.

I am always drawn to stories with good friendships. From the time I started reading Frog and Toad to weeping after finishing the Lord of the Rings trilogy (3rd time reading!), I have witnessed that companionship and togetherness captivate and stir my heart.

I know it is what I am made for… what we all are made for.

But here’s the problem right now:

2026 is notably not a great time in the history of human connection. I expand more on that in my post about friendship tips in an isolated age.

Right now, I am aware of two major issues I am having in the friendship and new connections space.

Let’s just dive into problem #1.

Out of Sight, Out of Mind

Issue: I want to be intentional but I leave it to my memory, free time, and what is in front of my face.

For the longest time, I have only been remembering to reach out/check in with my friends just because I scrolled past their name on my imessage, whatsapp, or 7 other dm platforms I use. ugh.

Either I will see a message I never responded to, or just realize when I see their name, “oh yeah I forgot I was trying to stay in touch with them.”

Several times I will be scrolling back on a list of DM’s that I will remember to give a friend a call.

Otherwise… out of sight, out of mind.

Which is not a great way to stay in touch with a long term friendship.

Time is not on my side when it comes to my friendships. It’s like a second language: if you don’t use it, you lose it. If you don’t stay in touch, enough time will drift, and all of a sudden, you are left questioning if you are still friends. If it would be weird to reach out again.

Do you ever see contacts on your phone, people that you would have easily said hi to or called, but now feel it would be impossible to reach back out?

No, nothing happened. No agreement to stop being friends.

Just time.

To solve this, you might laugh. I spread-sheeted it.

I wrote down all the people in my head that I wanted to stay in touch with, people I had wanted to be intentional with… and was immediately moved by seeing them all in one place!

Well, then I told my friend Daniel, and in the world of new possibilities, we started dreaming of an app to help us be more intentional with our people.

I guess 2026 can be helpful in some ways. I want to use the new tech to bring us all closer to each other, not more brain drained.

Check out what we built. 

If you need help to keep your friendships more front and center, try it, and give some feedback so we can make it as helpful as possible!

The Misery of Forgetting Names

People complement me for remembering names.

But to be honest, I suck at it.

I’m like a basketball player that misses most of my shots. However, I end up making more shots than others because I keep trying. I work at it. Embarrassingly so.

Remembering names and details is hard mental work.

Why?

You’re balancing a memory game and the nerve-racking, high stakes engagement of meeting another person. Or several at the same time.

Introductions, questions, stories, eye contact, body language… there’s a lot going on. My memory starts going sideways. Two minutes into the conversation, and a moment of dread sets in, like a dark blanket of “oh shit”.

I forgot their name, and I just met them.

In fact, I’m still talking to them. Ah!

I get distracted by the fact that I forgot their name, and now I am no longer listening to them, racking my brain to search for their name. It’s gone.

And I’ve lost the thread in my conversation with… this ‘person’.

Next time I see them, instead of being happy to see them, I feel dread.

I still don’t know their name. And now they are saying, “Hi Josh!”

I can’t be present with them any longer, due to the fact that I am now in my shameful shambles of forgetting their name. The database has been wiped clean. I still remember that they have a dog named Skittles, but I don’t think they would like it if I called them that.

Then comes the third time I see them. “Hi Josh!” Now it is past the point of no return.

If I ask for their name now, I’m cooked. That would be like telling my mom I forgot her name.

Um, what?

To solve this, I started writing down names and details in my phone notes.

When I went back to the coffee shop, I took a quick look and then was able to engage much deeper. Or, the fact that I wrote it down after meeting was enough for me to remember. I’m visual.

Well, Daniel and I had some fun on this, ideating on ways to capture acquaintances in a better way, and organize it all. My phone notes were getting messy.

Here’s what we made instead.

The app is still in development, but it is getting better and better with each version, and honestly, feedback from friends and family that are using as they go around town.

Let me know what you think! Can you relate? What helps you?

Thanks for tuning in. Let’s make this next season more intentional, more meaningful, more of the good old fashion human interaction that makes us well.